Ten Minutes

OK, I've only got ten minutes or so and this Internet connection is flaky, really poor (as we've come to expect). They want to shut us down you know. We are living in the final days etc. etc. My message is a simple one and I need to pass it on. You see your leaders, all of them, are lying to you. They're lying about everything, all the messages, all the spin, all the news stories they put out there are false, really untrue and made up. That's it, it's all propaganda and alien messages, totally distorted and weird, all lizard speak and Illuminati bollocks. They are the people that your parents didn't quite warn you about, they may have hinted, perhaps you read some of the signs but you need to know that now it's almost too late, time is running out. The only answer is to go down to the sea shore and take lots of gin, tonic, lemon and ice with you. Also take a nice glass, no need to compromise on your standards, oh and a decent cigar. So pour yourself a long one, look out to sea, watch how the light glints and plays on the water, feel the sun on your face and just tell yourself, " I really don't give a fuck anymore". Repeat this as often as necessary, take a long drink and punctuate the sunny conversation with as much gin as you are comfortable with. Then just let everything go. Trust me on this.